The pressure to keep up with others and give children development opportunities from very young ages transforms them into students with remarkable performances, but can also take them to the verge of exhaustion.
Exhaustion can water from very young photo: Pexels/Karolina Grabowska
In an interview for “Weekend Adevărul”, the psychologist Mirela Ustucă draws attention to the fact that to all we need to measure, and what we ask the children must be in accordance with the development stage they cross and their needs. It should be taken into account that, at a young age, children need a great need for play and time with their parents, says the psychologist, many tends to satisfy this need less and less. “Parents have very large requirements from children, still young, do not have a play time. They invest a lot and, I noticed this in kindergarten, parents do not play with children, parents make sheets with children.”draws attention to the psychologist.
The pressure that exhausts
In addition, there is the pressure exerted by society, parents often compare their children with friends, neighbors, relatives. “The society presses you, not the kindergarten system, because, at least in the kindergarten, no one asks you.
says the specialist. The desire to achieve the performance of the other children makes parents in return: “When I talk to parents, at kindergarten, we talk about the home program, what they do on a regular day. And I find out that most do many records.” adds Mirela ustucă.
At the preschool age, play is not only a very big desire for children, but also essential for their physical, emotional, social and cognitive development. Thus, the specialist recommends that parents make time for such activities: “We can play you hiding, we can play with the ball. Now we don’t have much time, because we get a great deal of technology, and this is a reality, and stress dries to all our powers and, when we get home, we are exhausted.” The psychologist recommends parents first to understand this need for children, to satisfy them and, not to be neglected, to be careful about any signs that could indicate exhaustion in children. An environment rich in play opportunities will help the little ones grow healthy, balanced and prepared for future challenges.
From psychic to physical is just one step
Burnout in children in the primary classes is an increasingly common phenomenon, caused by academic pressure, overload through extracurricular activities and lack of time for play and relaxation. Although the burn is often associated with adults, children can feel the same symptoms of physical, emotional and mental exhaustion. “If the parent makes no change in the life of the child, the effects of overload will go on the medical side. The child does not speak, the child does not express, he somatizes. The child does not say” my head hurts, I get tired. ” Somatizes physically. draws attention to the specialist.
Often, parents choose school and a certain teacher precisely because they know that the teacher has very high standards. Other times, parents fall into this trap without choosing, but simply enrolling their child at the closest school. “From my point of view, parents should not be judged or labeled. We should discover the reason, what they wanted to do. But it is important to ask for help. When a child somatizes belly pain, pain of anything, should ask for help. Because there are children who, from a medical point of view, have summoned until they have developed a disease and can get rid of it. Or requires long -term treatment. We can talk about hormonal diseases, we can talk about a lot ”draws the counselor.
In another reality
Another approach that is not found in many families, and negative affections will be seen over time, is that parents do not prepare their children and for difficult situations that will have to cope at some point. From the desire to offer them everything, I even keep them from the necessary experiences, the specialist draws attention: “We, the family, are a laboratory for them. I mean better in our family, in our little laboratory, we teach them to know frustration, to know the dissatisfaction, so we can talk about it, to find solutions, than to live them outside. E! ”Things were clear now. explains Mirela Ustuca.
Problematic situations still appear, says the psychologist, when families raise their children using parenting models with which many may agree with, but they do not match the reality we live in.
Also, the transition from the primary classes to the gymnasium can be a stage to which the children adapt heavy, because they are going to interact not with the teacher they know and who know and feel safe, but with teachers with different personalities, with different requirements, the counselor Mirela Usuca draws. Children should adapt to a different system, with several teachers, new rules and higher academic requirements. The unknown can generate anxiety, and the increased volume of themes and responsibilities can become overwhelming. Many students can feel insecure, especially if in primary school they were used to exceling. In addition, they have to manage their own schedule, themes and relationships with teachers. They are asked for more autonomy, and some may feel the pressure to become “more mature”.
Depression and irascibility in teenagers
In older children, signs of burnout can be similar to addictions, so that a specialist may need to understand what the child really goes through and to help. “Psychic reactions, such as depression, anxiety, change of mood, can occur. We see that it is a very irritable person, a very tired person, a person who does not want to interact. Anxiety, but we observe changes primarily in terms of behavior ”explains the psychologist. A specialist will have the ability to discover what is the basis of these alarm signals and discern if it is a state of exhaustion or is a consumption of substances, etc.
Children can remain “without battery” due to photo overload: Shutterstock
Such states are very possible to appear before the exams. “” It is very important to talk to the child, before the exam period. It is important to help him. If parents notice that the exam period exhausts it or that he has anxiety, fear, but they cannot help him personally, they must ask the help of the school counselor, because he can help the child. Emotional. Kinesthetic, it has to be in motion, because he is a very dynamic person ”, emphasizes the psychologist.
The importance of sleep
The quality of sleep also puts its mark on the school performance, a tired student having difficulty staying at the lessons and processing the new information. Without sufficient sleep, students forget what they have learned faster, have weaker results in tests that involve logical thinking and are more prone to anxiety and irritability, which also affects relationships with colleagues and teachers. “There are a lot of children who even from kindergarten no longer have a quality sleep. I sleep very little, they stand very much connected to devices And then the brain has no way to yield. I do not recommend the use of phones, tablets in young children. Giving his phone once, we can’t get it anymore. At one point we will feel we have to do this, but we can’t, and enter a vicious circle. If he is a child who is preparing for the exam, I would not let him sleep with the phone in the room ”,
says the specialist. The temptation to use the phone during training is very high, which adults feel, because, already some studies have shown, cause dependence on cocaine consumption, the psychologist said.
