“We complain that we are experiencing a crisis of values. Not a thought. Today’s young people have role models, here is Lele and Albert NBN, the one who cursed Romania at the Beach, please”, writes psychologist Mihai Copăceanu. He describes a high school prom where he saw boys and girls who had consumed too much alcohol.
41% of Romanian teenagers have consumed alcohol in the last 30 days, according to the European ESPAD 2024 report.
About 81% of Romanian teenagers (15-16 years old) have consumed alcohol at least once in their life – above the EU average of about 73%.
Other local data previously showed that young people start drinking around age 13 or even earlier.
Also according to the ESPAD 2024 report, approximately 26% of 15-16 year olds have smoked tobacco in the last 30 days, compared to a European average of around 18%. Romania ranks 4th in Europe for this indicator.
The report shows that almost 1 in 3 Romanian teenagers have tried electronic cigarettes, and some use them regularly.
Romania is above the European average in alcohol and tobacco consumption among teenagers – both in alcohol prevalence (81% vs ~73% EU) and in tobacco consumption (26% vs ~18% EU).
Statistics translated into reality: a bleak landscape
Psychologist Mihai Copăceanu reported how these statistics look in real life after he attended a ball with 1,000 students.
“At the Sibiu Ball I saw many happy children, hundreds or even over a thousand children dancing, smiling, seeing their friends again, hugging and feeling good on a Saturday evening”began his psychologist Mihai Copăceanu.
The children of class IX, helped by other older colleagues, put efforts in preparing a special program. “I liked their dancing the most, the performances in the movements, the collaboration with the partner and some of the videos they had to make, it can be seen that they worked, as well as the direction behind some ideas. I say some ideas, because I have some comments, below”. completed the psychologist.
This image of happy children is every parent’s satisfaction and goal. And all children have the right to well-being and happiness. “But like not anyway and anytime. And here I start the discussion about what I DIDN’T like about prom“, shows Copăceanu.
“When I left at night I saw boys and girls who had consumed too much alcohol and were barely able to stay on their feet”
The psychologist listed no less than 8 worrying aspects about today’s youth:
“The first impact was with the kids who were waiting to enter the prom. Not all of them, but the vast majority of them were smoking, smoking e-cigarettes and classic cigarettes. When I say kids I mean minors, most of them were in high school, supporting their 9th grade classmates and some in middle school. You could easily see that he was not 15 years old. Too few students. It is the saddest picture, to find that a large part of a group of children is smoking. It is a public health problem. Think about the effects over time. What a generation of health problems we will have in a few years. Not to mention that an addiction does not come alone.”
The second worrying aspect, says Copăceanu, was the consumption of alcohol: “when I left for the night I saw boys and girls who had consumed too much alcohol and were barely able to stand. Those who did not consume were a minority. Let’s not think that the children came to the ball for mineral water and crack. No thought.”
“He didn’t even start the first verse because he already got money, money, dedications from those kids, 500, 700, 1000”
And the “artistic impression” of the ball left much to be desired. A manelist, Lele (Robert) and trapper Albert NBN were invited. Even though he is not a well-known manelist, Copăceanu was negatively impressed by the way he was received: “the whole hall jumped up, the kids already had their phones lit up and the first verse didn’t even start because he already received money, money, dedications from those kids, 500, 700, 1000. I could see how he was getting money and how the dedications were jumping. A couple was invited on stage, other dedications. And the dedications were flowing. The children had probably received extra money from their parents for the tutor. I didn’t like this job. Nor the fact that another soloist was casually consuming alcohol while holding a large glass of white wine. What message are you sending?”
The psychologist also discussed the hit of the evening: “Give her a drink she’s mad. She’s mad she’s been cheated on.” It got into my head too. A song that catches you by the rhythm and the phones and the lyrics sung by all the children were in the air. Simply delirious.”
Copăceanu claims, with sadness, that there is no question of experiencing a crisis of values: “No idea. Today’s young people have role models, here’s Lele and Albert NBN, the one who cursed Romania at the Beach, please and who said “I’ll just fine him”. The crowd (also children) shouted with joy, cheered him. The message of the lyrics of both singers I don’t want to comment on them anymore. I’ll just remind you of one verse: “For pixzde I will always be a lover. For suckers I will remain important”.
“There were some recurring ideas: luxury cars, cigarettes and alcohol, and violence”
The psychologist reflected on the way the ball was held: “There were no more general culture questions from literature, history, geography, which clearly differentiated knowledge, culture and education. Not at all. In one test they were asked to create sentences with 3 common words. And it was not easy for them. Three of the seven pairs chose to dance on the mane. Moreover, in most of the videos they created and were shown, there were several ideas that were repeated: luxury cars, cigarettes and alcohol, and violence, in many situations she slaps him or pushes him. Gambling, playing cards and again alcohol. Children would not have chosen and included in their video creation such themes if they did not represent something to them.”
Essentially, he says, think if these videos were possible in another European space, if we can identify a 15-year-old kid just filming himself drinking from a whiskey glass. “I didn’t see…“, says the psychologist.
“In the face of such a reality, it is understandable that school is boring, outdated, meaningless, annoying, useless”
The saddest conclusion is that “in the face of such a reality, it is understandable that school is boring, outdated, meaningless, annoying, useless. What use are all the theories in chemistry or physics, all the years in history when Albert NBN, our idol only has 6 classes? It’s understandable how frustrated children feel at school, that they can’t concentrate, how forced they feel to learn, in fact, they don’t even do their homework, they feel forced to meditate and how addicted they are to social media and the phone. And on prom night, in a place with lots of friends and music, the phone was an integral and important part of their time there. So 6 hours at school without a phone is a punishment.”
Finally, perhaps the saddest image is of the parents who knowingly brought their children to prom: “I was watching moms and dads park and let kids out. It was car after car. I’m not talking about those who competed and had a nice experience as freshmen. It doesn’t even matter if they were 18 or 19. Legally they’re free. I’m talking about 12, 13, 14-year-olds who were exposed and encouraged to participate in an event where tobacco and alcohol were heavily consumed and where the leaders of the evenings were a manele player and a rapper.”
In fact, Albert at 21 years old, with only 6 classes completed, admitted that he does not pay 2 pennies per school: “I used to go to school to laugh anyway. I didn’t like it, brother, it didn’t have anything to do with me! I mean, I learned, I don’t know, until the fourth grade. What do you learn until the fourth grade? That you don’t even learn.”
“It’s not tiktok my dear. It’s not the devil”
The psychologist points out that you are not a cool parent if you allow your 12, 13-year-old kid to go to such a “ball”. “As a parent you don’t have to be his friend. Your child has his friends. As a parent you have to be a responsible parent. Don’t expose him to tobacco, alcohol, manele and rap. Even if it’s fun and super cool.“
To accept whatever he proposes to you is a mistake, irresponsibility, explains Copăceanu. “No daddy, you’re 12, don’t go there. At 12 at night you really should be sleeping. Let it grow up. After 18 you can go to school or wherever you want. We are more responsible for the children’s education than we might think.”
The psychologist’s conclusion is that social networks are not the problem, but parents’ irresponsibility:
“It’s not tiktok my dear. That’s not the devil. It’s not something outside that influences them so much, especially if you’ve created a strong inside, it’s simply our general irresponsibility. It’s not just the kids today that are completely different, so are the parents.”
If the prom had been for students, for those over 18, the discussion would have had a different meaning, he concludes the post.
