Officially, in Romania, over 200,000 children are diagnosed with ADHD. In reality, however, their number is much higher. “For fear of being labeled by society, parents refuse to take them to a therapist to give them a diagnosis. You can’t fight the prejudice of those around you, ignorance and malice”, said teacher Claudia Cârstocea for “Adevărul”, who explained to us how these children can be integrated into the community, now, at the beginning of the school year.
Hyperactive children have problems with concentration and memory. Photo source: archive
They are hyperactive and often get their teachers into a lot of trouble. “I had a little boy who would get up from his desk during class and run around the classroom. Or he came to the board, next to me, and didn’t want to leave. I also had to deal with aggressive children, but also with children who walked among the benches and disturbed their colleagues“, Miruna Marinescu, a teacher at a school in Bucharest, told us. “No one taught us how to handle such situations. And every teacher tries to deal with them as best he can. I prefer to call them naughty children. Diagnosed with ADHD or not, they come with a series of challenges that we often don’t know how to manage”, Claudia Cârstocea also confessed to us. “We are not psychologists, we are not trained in this. Therefore, without expert help, without someone to guide us first and foremost in managing this problem, we are left with only our own experience.” continued the teacher.
“Their integration lies in our power”
Claudia Cârstocea believes that the problem of children with special educational requirements could only be solved when parents, educators, teachers and authorities work together, join forces with a common goal. “We are talking about a joint effort. I, for example, try to talk a lot with parents. Because yes, I’ve also had cases of mischievous people in class. We have had it in every generation, and the most difficult time is the preparatory class. In the meetings I appeal to their responsibility, patience, tolerance, wisdom and compassion”. In general, the teacher continues, they understand such situations, but everything has a limit. “There are parents who don’t like seeing their children bullied. No parent likes to see their child hit or beaten, for example. And fight back.” And from here to the outbreak of a general conflict is only one step.
Claudia Cârstocea specified that the Romanian school has an acute lack of school counselors, specialized people who could intervene in such situations and who could be of real help. “In every school we should have a school counselor, a psychological office. These children with CES should be monitored, helped to integrate, conflicts to disappear. The counselor is the only one in a position to handle such cases. But, in his absence, we, the teachers, try”, considers the teacher.
In addition to the positive feedback of the parents, their patience and understanding, in addition to the help offered by the counselors, one more aspect must be touched upon: a child with CES, in certain situations, should benefit from a person to accompany him to school , to guide, help and guide him step by step. “That shadow person is his shadow in the collective and in society. Because children with CES also have the right to education, socialization and friends. They are, unfortunately, most of them, marginalized, misunderstood, pointed at and turned into negative examples like “SO NOT”. And this happens especially in situations where the family does not care, the school counselor does not exist, and the classroom teacher simply does not cope. And these children have no fault”.
“A stone on the heart and a longing”
Parents, in turn, must give their children attention, love, affection. “To be not only near them, but also with them. If the little ones grow up alone, forgotten in front of some devices, far from the affection of their parents, they are sent to daycare, from daycare to kindergarten, then to school and from school to after school… if parents do not spend quality time with them, these children will most likely grow up with an acute need for love. And through their behavior, that’s what they’re actually asking for: love, affection, attention.” The parent must understand that a child exhibiting a behavioral problem is seeking connection. And that connection should have happened during the 7 years at home.
Psychologist Gabriel Diaconu also completes the idea. “When the child is agitated, he is not necessarily hyperkinetic. I might just be titillating them because they miss their mommy or daddy. When a child doesn’t focus, or is frustrated, or doesn’t do homework, or…or…it doesn’t have to be ADHD. Maybe he just has a stone on his heart and a longing. Psychiatry should never become complicit in social ills. He should state them, and denounce them. Otherwise we will not have “mental health”. We will have “clinical remission”. Which is not normal”.
How do we know we have a child with ADHD?
ADHD means two things, explains psychologist Gabriel Diaconu. Namely: problems with the child’s ability to concentrate on an activity enough to complete it, i.e. excessive motor behavior. “Psychiatrists describe excessive motor behavior as hyperkinetic. And when hyperkinetic syndrome meets attention deficit disorder, chaos ensues. It’s not just that the child’s energy level is overflowing. There is chaos there, an outpouring of energy, like boiling water dripping down the side of a kettle, states Gabriel Diaconu.
To better understand what the behavior of a child with ADHD entails, the psychologist comes up with a simple example. “A ping-pong player is hyperkinetic, but very focused. You can’t even see the ball, let alone the paddle. But the ball lands, as if by magic, where the player puts it. The hyperkinetic child with little attention span? Ping pong balls all over the house. Without fillet”.
But ADHD is also a learning, adaptation, memory, social behavior disorder. The psychologist also draws attention to one aspect: the fatigue of the child with ADHD. “A good period of time apparently he is tireless. It is inexhaustible. And exhausting at the same time. From one point onward you can observe his movement through the physical space, but also mentally that it accelerates to “red”, like the centrifuge of a washing machine. Beyond a threshold, frustration appears, impatience is at its highest. And then the tantrums, the crying. Tics appear, which suggest the seizure of the brain’s “clutch”. And sleep also becomes restless, fragmented”.
The specialist states that this “condition” can be one that the child is born with, but it can also be acquired. “Few have brains ‘inherited’ from parents with ADHD, and even those where one or both parents have similar traits rather ‘learn’ such traits epigenetically.”
