The Romanian government approved the National Strategy for supporting parents, a project aimed at preventing child abuse, school dropout, bullying and violence. The aim is also to prevent the phenomenon of neglecting the little ones, as well as their exploitation through work. Basically, parents will be schooled, taught to be parents not only in name, but in the true sense of the word. And in this process, different entities will be involved, from the state authorities, to teachers, educators, school counselors, psychologists, doctors and specialists of various NGOs and foundations.
Parents will receive parenting lessons from specialists. Photo source: archive
“We are trying to make parents more responsible, their more active involvement in children’s lives, but in order to meet the requirements, someone – a specialist, an authority in the field – should also tell them how to do it. We all know that parenting is a learning curve. But, although we all want the best for our children, we often don’t know how to help them, how to support them, how to make their way through life”, explained for “Adevărul” Iuliana Constantinescu, the president of the Parents’ Association of the “Lucian Blaga” Theoretical High School in Bucharest, but also one of those who contributed to the creation of this document.
The initiative came from the Ministry of Education, which, for the first time in the education law, specified that the state is obliged to support the princes in exercising their parental duties. “Through collaboration with the Ministry of Family and other related institutions, this national strategy on supporting parents was developed. For the first time we are talking about acquiring parental skills, parents will be helped to acquire them, and this help will come from several directions”, explains Iuliana Constantinescu.
Social services more involved in child protection
What does this help consist of? First of all, families experiencing financial difficulties will receive support, so that children do not feel these deprivations. Here, the main actors will be the representatives of the directorates for child protection and social assistance, but also social mediators from vulnerable areas: “All competent institutions must join forces and offer real support, because in Romania, for now, social protection is just a beautiful dream. When a parent is in trouble – whether they need information, financial support when going through a difficult time, or are dealing with emotional or physical abuse – they should know who they can turn to and where they can request support”.
“School should teach parents how to be real parents”
Parenting lessons, schooling, more precisely of parents, can be done right at school, through the direct involvement of educators, teachers, directors, counselors and school psychologists: “In order to teach children about what sexual abuse means, how to recognize it, how to protect themselves, what is aggression, physical and verbal violence, bullying… we must first teach parents about these concepts, about what do they entail and what are the dangers. And this is where the school intervenes, the teachers who will have the purpose of educating adults in this sense”.
Teachers will be encouraged to try different methods to attract parents to school, to involve them in various activities such as meetings, seminars, webinars, meetings, discussions, information sessions, says the co-author of the document: “Obviously, the authorities will also have to think of a plan to train specialists in parental education to take the reins from the hands of teachers. And here we are talking about school counselors, who are very few at the moment, but also about school psychologists who, unfortunately, are also completely lacking. We need well-trained people to explain various things to parents, to bring them the necessary information. Because the acquisition of those parental skills, about which we speak so beautifully on paper, is done by guiding the adult by a professional”.
In general, according to Iuliana Constantinescu, parents of children up to 10 years of age are much more involved in their education than parents who have older children, parents who no longer have absolute control: “Parents with young children in daycare, kindergarten and primary school are more open, more flexible, communicative and here it should be insisted on, on this level. To bring them to school, to talk to them about what it means to be a real parent, to guide them, to help them, to support them. That is what the school should do in the first place. To help parents to be good parents for their children”.
Parental education in doctors’ and psychologists’ offices
However, parental education can also be done in the office of family doctors, gynecologists, nutritionists or psychologists – actors who should also be actively involved in this process: “Doctors should inform parents better, in addition to the medical act itself, be more attentive to other needs they have. But not only parents should benefit from greater attention, but also young people who are preparing to become parents should be better informed, made responsible, educated in this sense”.
A doctor has all the necessary tools to educate and not just to treat a condition. “A young mother may need to know more information about raising a small child, about breastfeeding, vaccination, nutrition. Just as a teenage girl needs to know more about pregnancy, contraception, sexually transmitted diseases, etc. A family might need to know how to properly manage the child’s adolescence, and this information can come from a psychologist.” considers Iuliana Constantinescu.
The school of parenting, an effort of the whole society
The strategy aims at a specific goal, which is to make us all aware that everything we do or don’t do for our children will have a significant and long-term impact on their lives:“And if you ask me, I think the biggest challenge for parents is the huge flow of information coming online and from all directions – social networks, forums, publications, etc. At some point, you don’t know what to believe anymore, you don’t know what’s good, what’s bad, what’s right.”
The national strategy for supporting parents requires a joint effort of the whole society: local authorities, school, parents, specialists in different fields: “A big challenge will be to attract parents to the school, to actually bring them into the banks and convince them to give their children more time, energy, understanding, affection, emotional support. To realize that they are there for the good of their children. In small communities, people are more receptive, but in cities the situation is totally different, and there should be a lot of insistence here”.
Iuliana Constantinescu believes that the strategy will produce its effects only if this is really desired: “We are talking about a real school of parenting that spans several levels and everyone has to contribute.”
We will have to be patient, however, because mentalities do not change overnight and education does not consolidate overnight. “The project will run until 2030, and only then would we be able to draw a line and calculate the impact, see the effects,” Iuliana Constantinescu also said.
