More than three decades after the Revolution, some habits die hard and others not at all. Several young people have found it out, some of them just at the beginning of their career path.
Bribery was not invented by Romanians, but it was embraced by many. PHOTO: Shutterstock
Tipping, “attentions” and gifts are not necessarily specific only to Romanians, but they can still be found here, everywhere. Even though Romania is the country in Eastern Europe with the most pro-Western population, many Romanians have remained faithful to some old ideas, not necessarily specific to European values.
A young woman from Romania raised on the Reddit platform a problem she encountered recently. She tells that she recently found out that in order to support the final in education, she will have to offer a meal to those who will evaluate her, plus some “attentions”.
“Background: I work in education and I have to pass the final next year (2 inspections of 3 hours each and an exam). Being newer, I asked the colleagues who had already given how it was. After 2-3 minutes the conversation turned to what I have to “give” to the methodist and the director. I’m over the moon, I ask what you mean. Well, first of all, apparently I have to feed them, because they are starving for those 3 hours with me. Ok, well, either, I’ll be honest with lunch, because the one with double my salary and per diem can’t afford food. No comment what salary does the director get… And then the girls tell me “and don’t forget the gift”. What? Would you like to? Did you get them anything? Yes, one gave hundreds of lei for some jewelry sets, another took 500 lei vouchers for each, another gave the traditional (expensive) candies and coffee. I stayed there stupid on the chair,” she began her post.
At the end, the young woman wondered why Romanians have remained tributary to these customs for so long and is surprised that even those from the “generation of 90” still have such ideas.
“Well, aren’t we going to stop this stuff, too? Come on, I understand (but I don’t excuse) these people from the 90s generation, because that’s how I’ve seen their parents do it all their lives, but these colleagues of mine were under 25 years old…my mother tells me the same, to give them something, because that’s what they all do . I feel like I’m going crazy, the problem is apparently with me, that I’m the one with silly ideas, like someone doing work for which they’re paid without expecting extra attention or gifts…”she concluded.
Who invented tipping?
The young woman’s post led to a debate, and most netizens agreed with her and expressed their displeasure with these down-to-earth habits. However, they did not manage to agree on who and how did to stop these ideas in Romania and to impregnate them so deeply in the collective mind.
“I agree with you. Looks like there aren’t that many of us. I was left with a lump in my DNA from the time of the Phanariots“, someone told him. “It’s hard to break this cycle, because you have a direct disadvantage if you don’t come with all kinds of “cautions””someone else warned her.
“The Ottomans have well “impregnated” the corrupt mentality in the mentality of the Romanians”,
it was an opinion. “The communists have well «impregnated» the corrupt mentality in the mentality of the Romanians”someone contradicted him. “The Ottomans have well “impregnated” the corrupt mentality in the mentality of the communists“, another intervened.
Someone else has nuanced the issue, trying to find the cause. “Not. This plate with the Ottomans and the Phanariots is “foreigners are to blame” invented by Pašoptists (many of Phanariot origins too). Well-intentioned, but fake. In the meantime communism has passed and this is fashionable as a scapegoat. In the name of Allah and Lenin, however bad they were, it is not their fault. They came and folded on what was here. It’s our fault, it’s the problem of the Romanian collective mentality that needs to be radically changed.”
“It is obvious that we are those fools who fell from the sky in this country. My mother worked in the polyclinic and last year she told me a story in which a man refused to pay extra to the doctor to perform a caesarean section on his wife. He got mad at me when I got mad at what he was telling me. We live in a country where people are seen as being divided into two categories: suckers and tricksters. It is perfectly reflected in our elected officialsi”, wrote another outraged.
Who is to blame?
“I’m from the 90s generation and I don’t like attention, I thought that these younger people are more open-minded and don’t make generalizations. How easy it is to spray”revolted one of the visionaries from the 90s generation.”
“Even in the hospital, small favors are still given to doctors through gifts or money. Old people have the excuse of the old mentality. Young people don’t“, someone pointed out. “No one has any excuse. My parents are on the verge of retirement, but they don’t “take” just because “that’s how it’s done and we all take”. Let’s stop beating around the bush, older generations are older, not worse. Those who took bribes knew very well what they were doing. And they knew it was wrong“, wrote someone more realistic. “And the tip is still a small consideration and it’s not the old people who support this trend. No one has any excuse. They are just excuses”, another put the full stop on the i.
“However, it is not illegal to tip a waiter or saloon or taxi/Bolt driver etc,” someone observed. “But it should be. Why should doctors be more suckers than waiters? Why should waiters be cooler than doctors?”wrote another.
“One is the tip, offered voluntarily at the end if you were satisfied with the services provided, another is the tip you oblige because otherwise you are at a disadvantage. I don’t support either, but they are different notions.”
was another opinion.
“This problem, you say, belongs to the Romanians’ DNA. Even funnier: as a doctor, teacher/teacher, etc. if you refuse the attentions given to you, it creates the impression that you are the one who is insensitive and does not appreciate the kindness of others… what a paradox. I, for one, feel so ashamed when I hear my family go to the family doctor with coffee or whatever. At the same time, far too many staff condone this behavior (because they’re basically getting something on the side, right?) and simply make a difference. You run the risk of your child being graded and treated differently, you run the risk of a family member being delayed in treatment/surgery, and so on. I am disgusted by this Romanian way of things. I don’t know if I had anything to lose until now, but I always chose to offer respect, understanding, etc. in return. and I was fine, I never paid attention. I think it is in our role that people who want society to evolve to talk about principles, normality and signal deviations from professionalism. Also, more important than anything, we need to teach our children how and why they need to be people with a backbone, and slowly, hopefully, it will get better and better.” it was another point of view.
Someone immediately proved him right: “Yes, you’re right…I’ve had a parent come in with something (I don’t know what it was) and be absolutely shocked that I don’t want to receive it. She was starting to cry that I was treating her daughter differently. I refrained from telling her that I didn’t even know who her girl was, that I was new to school”someone wrote to him.
Another young woman reported a prank that had extremely unpleasant consequences: “Unfortunately, that’s how it is. I came across these warnings from the psycho-pedagogical module. In the 3rd year, the teacher from the module did not come to my classes. I taught 7 hours instead of 4 and he refused to pass me. I was too tired at that time. And… I gave up. A year later I found out that the others in the group had put up money and taken it as a gift. “What, you didn’t know you were supposed to do the same?! That’s why he tormented you”. I’m not a picky eater, but unfortunately sometimes you have to if you want to get away easily. As I’m not a fan of kissing backwards, and now I have other problems in the field of activity. Skills don’t always matter.”
